Thursday, May 30, 2013

Hot

Anyone who knows me, knows I am always cold. This morning I was hot, it was 73 degrees when I headed out the door for my run, at 6am!!!!  Needless to say I dont feel too well about my run, I am going further every time but I was drenched and crabby by the end for sure.

I try not to talk about my weight loss to people, for the fear of failing again. One of my coworkers yesterday, unprovoked told me I was looking good. I thanked her and said I had lost 25 pounds. Then the questions came out, I hate when people ask questions. Everyone is convinced there is some miracle pill or drink and they will be skinny, not the case. Hard work and dedication is all you can do to change your life. Luckily for me, my coworker is wonderful and we chatted about working out and eating differently, I love her. In our conversation we talked about the hardest thing for me, others trying to bring me down. She completely agreed with me, people don't like other to succeed and have their own body issues they need to take care of. It's nice to know I have a partner in crime in this lifestyle change.

My coworker caught me off guard yesterday when she said what is your goal weight. WHAT!?!?! I'm never going to admit this out loud, what if its unrealistic, what if I never get there. She told me her goal and it was higher than my goal, I didn't know how to react so I lied and made up a number, ugh terrible start. So here so its out there in the open, my goal weight is 133, or half my size. Whoa that was harder than I thought. I need to come up with marker weights, this week to set minor goals. My birthday is in October and would do backflips to be 200 or less. I am not trying to rush this in anyway but this is my motivation.

Never make changes that aren't lifestyle changes, diets end, lifestyle changes don't.

Wednesday, May 29, 2013

Keys, ID, I am not a runner

It is a beautiful morning in the District. I was excited to run in just a t-shirt (bright orange Under Armor), I start walking at the door and I panic, where do I keep my apartment key? When I go out in my long sleeve I have a pocket to zip my key up. I ended up putting my key in the tiny pocket in the front of my pants, I felt it every few steps because I was so nervous I would loose my key. I have to come up with a new place I don't worry about. Where do real runners keep their keys?!?!?

When I run I am very adamant that my iPhones (yes plural) stay at home. In no way do I want to be reached while I am out, this is my me time. Insert line from pilot of West Wing, CJ running on a treadmill... Well today I had another panic, what happens if I get lost, something happens to me, I get injured. I may have to go against my instincts and take my phone, but not yet, I wil stick to roads I know and pray I dont get hurt. I also saw a man wearing his iPod on his arm and on the other arm he had a clear band with his Driver License in it, then I panicked again, should I do that? Do I need to be ID'd just incase. I have to get out of my own head when I run from now on. I will not be brought down by myself, my own worst enemy.

I will never be a runner, but it is getting easier. I will admit my weight has not changed for two days now, and I am kinda bummed out. I know I shouldn't be but I am. Again can't let the little things get me down. I have slowly become obsessed with this other blog and she went through a very drastic weight loss, when she started running she was didn't have issues but after she had surgery she returned to running and kept gaining weight for two weeks, TWO WEEKS are you kidding me, my motivation is not that great so I must keep my chin up and thing about the future.

Happiness, Karma, and Running?

Tuesday, May 28, 2013

The Hill

For being an overweight person, I have always had a pretty active lifestyle. I can walk forever, or so it seems. But running is one game I have never been able to crack. I finally decide to call Couch to 5k a loss and do this on my own. This weekend I attempt to go outside and it was freezing, typical Blaine would turn around and call it a loss. BUT the new and improved Blaine went straight downstairs to an empty gym and got on the treadmill. I did a nice warm up and then would run until I couldn't breathe anymore and then I would walk. Once I caught my breathe I would run again. This was great, I breezed through a short workout, not wanting to over work myself I did a short workout. Sunday morning, I did the same thing. I am so proud of myself.

My biggest weakness hit me on Sunday afternoon- booze. It started off just laying by the pool sipping water and end with drinking a handle of gin (with two others of course) and eating three veggie burgers. Are you kidding me!?!?! Three burgers and booze. I woke up on Memorial Monday, and knew it was game over for working out. I swore up and down I would get a workout in, no dice.

But Tuesday before work I got out of bed, put Cubbie in his crate and when for a run. I mapped my route out before I went to bed the night before, I've learned in life I should do as much as possible at night but mornings are not my thing. I started out walking at a normal pace and then ran a long stretch, very proud of myself. I finished the part of the street walking. I then ran around my work parking garage and kept going, pushing myself beyond my limits and up the hill. Little known fact the streets surrounding the US Capitol are miserable for running. I did it though, without dying. I walked for a little bit and got in one more run before walking the rest of the way home.

I can't believe I ran that hill, I can't wait to do it tomorrow. I need to lengthen my route but I am at a loss for which streets I should add. I will admit I love my neighborhood in my quadrant of DC, but its still an up and coming neighborhood and the homeless are still sleeping around at 6am. If I had the courage to run under one bridge I would be able to run the Mall, which is an ultimate goal. I just don't know who I will meet under that bridge in the morning. Sorry Mom, hope you are not reading this right now.

“Every morning we are born again. What we do today is what matters most.” 
― Gautama Buddha

Color Run

Every January I say the same thing, this is the year I loose weight, every year but this year. This year I set out to change my lifestyle. I changed me eating habits, which are already bizarre to begin with. I am a dairy free vegetarian. I have been a vegetarian for 6 years now, dairy free for a year. A year ago I was getting very sick almost on a daily basis and realized that I might be allergic to something, so I did something about it, thus starts my allergy testing. I was diagnosed with a diary allergy which for a farm girl saying good bye to cheese was so hard. Little did I know how many things have dairy proteins in them, I cant eat a single thing I love anymore.

Back to the lifestyle change. Last November my roommate and I decided to do the Color Run in DC, so like every other time before I turned on Couch to 5k and quit after 4 days. I then decide okay well I will start walking every morning before work. That last for about 4 weeks and then I slept in one day, then two days and then I stopped all together, yet again. Great moves for the lifestyle change right? Well during my 4 weeks of walking every morning before work I lost about 20 pounds, and surprisingly kept it off even when I stopped walking, thus proving my theory again that diet alone can make you healthy (clearly, a medical doctor here).

Well the Color Run came and passed, I had every intention of just walking the 5k by myself because my roommate decided going to Preakness was a more important event, than walking with me, and then I ended up staying in bed with my boy. Cuddling over walking a 5k any day. Later that morning I went to Trader Joe's with my friend, Laura and saw two girls who had just finished the Color Run together, they were still covered head to toe, and I was super bummed.

That was 10 days ago and 15 miles. I am determined this time, taking control of my life and I am going to run a half marathon. Knowing myself I signed up for a 5k race in the fall, I know I will be running more than a 5k at that point, but I need to know that I can do it first before I shell out the $160 for a full marathon. Who would have thought running would be so expensive!?!?!

I can do this, its not about giving up a life, its about changing the one you already love.